Wandering a 7-11 at 12:30 am, already dealing with an unnatural Cheetos craving is not the best time to fight with your will power. You’ll almost inevitably lose, as was the case last Thursday when I picked up a bottle of the new limited edition Jolly Rancher Cinnamon Cherry Fire soda. I hate fiery cinnamon. I know this. I KNOW this. I cringe at seeming rude when I constantly refuse a piece of Big Red. The mere idea of Red Hots disgust me. Yet I was putting $1.49(!!!) down on my debit card for the newest drink on the market.
“Maybe it will taste more like cinnamon sugar.” I told myself.
This line of thought somehow lead me to the idea that I’d be drinking 16 ounces of French Toast soda, an idea that even disgusts me (although I’d still try it).
At the worst, I figured Katie would probably like it. She loves the spicy cinnamon! She’s craaazy!
After the debacle that was the Diet Pepsi Jazz Caramel Crème, maybe I was setting myself up for another failure. I’m not going to lie; my impulse shopping has lead to some horrible purchases. But here’s the kicker, I kinda liked it. Don’t get me wrong, it tastes exactly like the name. It’s like drinking Big Red or Red Hots, but carbonated and chilled to refrigerated tastiness.
It’s also a lighter drink than I was expecting. It’s definitely not as sweet as some of the other Jolly Rancher sodas, which seemed to rot my teeth with every tiny sip. It’s also lighter fare than a typical cola, yet heavier than your Sprites or Sierra Mists. Even after several sips I found myself still enjoying it, even if my brain was screaming at me to stop drinking something I shouldn’t be enjoying. It also does that when I drink a pina colada, if though I know I hate coconut. Would I buy more of Cinnamon Cherry Fire? Probably not, because ultimately it’s a CINNAMON SODA. And cinnamon without sugar is still rather gross to me. I’ll keep my cinnamon on my French toast and cinnamon rolls, thankyouverymuch.
If you’re reading this review hoping for a return visit from my spirit animal, the handsy octopus, you’ll be disappointed. There were no visions of that midnight molester. Maybe he’s taking the week off. Or maybe he’s warning someone of my idea to create a French Toast soda. I wonder if Jones Soda is hiring?
Katie quite liked it. She said the best part was that it was spicy yet cool, which shocked and tickled the taste buds.