I walked into 7-11 yesterday and did my normal stroll around the candy and chip aisle when I discovered something so terrifying that I knew that I had to buy them.
Doritos is at it again. Another mystery bag. Another mystery flavor. The catch? This time, the flavor is just the beginning. So, unlike last time when the flavor felt like one last cruel joke that life was playing on you before your personal end, they’re practically telling you what the flavor is if you go to the website on the front of the bag (www.snackstrongproductions.com).
No, the big deal this time is not become a flavor taster for the company. This time you have a chance to win $100,000. They’ve set up a Myst-like puzzle game at the website. Currently, only the first chapter is unlocked for play. It looks like the next chapter will be unlocked at midnight on Memorial Day. The cool thing about the contest is you actually can see how many people have made it as far as you have. When my good friend Chris and I finished the end of chapter one, it told us we were the 1700 or so person to make it this far. At the beginning, we were just one in a Dorito army over 4K strong.
The quest appears much harder than they are. Or, more likely, I tend to over think things. By the time the last puzzle came up, a drawing full of squares, triangles, and numbers, I was trying to figure out the values of missing angles and line lengths. Over a decade in honors and advanced placement classes will do that to a brain. I’ve been trained to look for the deepest answer possible. I tend to forgot Dr. House’s number one rule: Occam’s Razor. Wait. That’s his number two rule. His number one rule is everybody lies.
Occam’s Razor basically says, the simplest answer is usually the correct one. And I’m sure he’d be glad to know that his theory holds true, even against such modern technology as a Doritos flash based web site. A life’s work to solve a game about corn chips. That’s exactly what he was hoping for, I’m sure.
The games are basically variances of Simon, Mastermind, and code breaking. There’s no math involved. Keep it simple!
But more important than $100,000 is, “How did the chips taste? What’s the magical flavor? Did they make a nice Potato Salad Dorito to go along with their ass-tastic Cheeseburger debacle X-13D?”
Well, yes and no. The flavor definitely isn’t as out there as those X-13D chips I wrote about oh so long ago. But, in the scheme of things, it does make a nice companion piece to those Cheeseburger chips. Upon opening the bag, the initial smell taste revealed little. They smelled like Cool Ranch Doritos. But once you taste them, it’s like someone threw an entire lime at your face. There was no denying the citrus on these corn chips.
We originally decided that they were obviously margarita Doritos, or Margaritos as we coined them. But, we were quite wrong. Heading over to the Quest website, we were told to enter our guess into the cryptex on the screen. We tried margarita to no avail. Lemon lime? Nope. But then we noticed the hint at the top of the screen was spelling out the flavor for us.
The answer? Moutain Dew.
Yes. That’s right. Soak it in. Somewhere deep within the earth’s crust are scientists who are no creating hybrid snack foods. Chips are being bred with soda. Nature is crying. Up next? Chili Cheese Frito Sierra Mist.
YUM.
But, here’s the thing. They’re not that bad. They taste NOTHING like Mountain Dew. I don’t remember Mountain Dew carrying an over-the-top lime flavor. This tasted more like the margarita cupcakes I made a few weeks ago. But they’re not bad. They’re definitely better than the corn chips that come with just a hint of lime. But, the flavor also wears off quickly. By the time you take your last bite of a chip, there’s no flavor left. On the upside, if you’ve ever wanted to taste a naked Dorito, now is your chance. It turns out they taste like bland corn chips!
In this case, the flavor is just the beginning. It led to a fairly fun time waster for when you’re waiting for work to come in. What are the chances that you’ll win the $100K? Not good. They mention something about the first THREE people to get to the end will be given the golden idol to continue.
Maybe the rest of us will become flavor taster scientists so we can tell them to stop creating sins against nature.
**NOTE – Burger King is filling your hamburger chip void!**
Two Bites in Suburbia 
maybe the new flavor is “zest tortured pitbull”
i will never eat doritos again if they advertise on an Eagles game
and i love doritos
Well. My first guess was dog shit. Surprised I didn’t win the 100k. I could have bought enough mouth was to get this flavor out of my mouth.
i think the new flavor is like a lemon merang pie flavor, it’s lime but then it gets sweet at the end.
i didn’t really like them but they do grow on you
As a Doritos eating family, my wife picked up the $3.79 mystery bag without hesitation. Upon opening, i noticed no smell to give away the flavor, unlike the ketchup smell from the Cheeseburger X-13D’s. The initial taste was sort of bland, but then came the powerful lime burst. My guess was Key Lime pie…would have never guessed Mountain Dew.
Everyone in my family kind of dislikes these chips, but yet we continue to go back into the bag for more, as I sit and type this! They kind of grow on you, like a bad song. Since we will not buy this flavor again, I’ve got to go before the bag is gone…
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These are the FOULEST chips ever! I sort of thought that the bag of chips would be a mix of their traditional flavors, where you could eat each and guess which of their flavors it was. Since I pretty much like all forms of Doritos, I figured it would be a fun novelty. But instead, they are these truly disgusting sweet chips. Even my boyfriend who normally devours the bag in an hour ate just 3 before refusing to eat more. I tried to find a way to disguise the flavor, since I really hate wasting food, but there is no way I can finish this bag. Total waste..
I don’t think I’m gonna buy any Doritos again for a while, the experience was just too traumatic and I don’t want to be reminded of it.
I THINK I JUST DIED LAUGHING AT HOW FUNNY THIS ARTICLE WAS ROFL HAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHH
GOOD JOB I LOVED IT
walked to the local corner store on an ordinary summer day in st. louis craving a bag of chips. i initially wanted jalepeno cheetos, then i looked over to the doritos section. hmmm. i’m thinking maybe i’ll try spicy sweet chilli doriitos… naaa. maybe zesty taco and chipotle ranch…naaa, too risky- OH! what are these? THE QUEST doritos….hmmm intriuging. i pick them up, i get wierded out and put them back…. i pick them up again.. aww what the hey?!- i buy them walk back home and flop on the couch with my trusty laptop and burst open the bag. i grab like 3 and stuff them in my mouth…..WTF!!!!!!?????? lime tortilla flavored cupcakes sprinkled with taco mix??? DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!! those people have mastered marketing, they put the crap out… we the consumers ate it like the little guinea pigs we are- AND SOME OF YOU LIKED IT?? thanks alot doritos!- I WANT MY $1.05 BACK!! lol- my one year old likes them though…. so i guess they were worth soooomething… ugh!! GROSS! im offended…:-/
These are so good. When i found out that they were mountain dew i was like holy crap yum! they combined the two best things in the world. they taste like crap in teh beginning but they r good near the end when you get used to em.
I was thinking it was keylime,! But hey it’s , MD s might ound gross but it works for me i like them !!
Holy crap!
I was so surprised when I was right, Me and my friends were eating these, my first guess was Mountain Dew. One of my friends guessed Froot Loops. I found out I was right when I typed Mountain Dew in at the website!
These chips taste so bad that I want to cry….
I love this new flavor! I’ve always enjoyed Tostitos with lime, so I was pleasantly surprised when these turned out to be lime (there’s no way it’s Mountain Dew flavored.) In fact, they’re a lot more flavorful than Tostitos. If Doritos ever makes this a permanent flavor, I’ll be buying it every so often.
These are the worst chips I have ever tasted. My teenagers won’t even eat them. I’m calling the company and demanding my $$ back.
its fruit loops… I don’t care what doritos tell’s me the flavor is.
Ok….my husband came home late last night from a Wal-Mart run. This morning he turns to me–“Did you brush your teeth yet?” I look at him thinking to myself, “What a wierd question, while I slowly tasted the inside of my mouth…yes, I had brushed my teeth.” I aske him, “why?” He said, “turn around…black bag on the counter, new flavor, see if you can figure this one out!” So, I opened the bag. ‘Hmmmm…Quest.” Well, to be honest…I thought, “Fruity Pebbles?…Fruit Loops? Lime Doritos?” I could not figure it out! I just knew the answer was not that easy! So, he let me know. “Mountain Dew!” Now, it took a few more chips to ‘get the flavor.’ And–I guess it is Mountain Dew. I do think it’s pretty creative and they taste good. My kids like ’em….and they love Fruit Loops and Fruity Pebbles, too. Not too bad, pretty good, and a great conversation piece.
After suffering the disappointment of the last promotion (being one of the few who actually liked the X-13D chips… I purchased a total of 22 bags over the course of the promotion and still look forward to the day that will never come when they fulfill an empty promise to release the X-13Ds as a regular flavor) and seeing the shiny black mystery bag week after week, I finally gave in and bought a bag.
Like so many, I too found myself asking “How bad could they be?” Well, they’re way beyond THAT bad. After one bite, I was done. It’s interesting to hear that the mystery flavor was supposed to be Mountain Dew, because I was also thinking they tasted more like the crappy fruit cereal my kids crave so much.
Whatever possessed them to think that turning a soda flavor into a chip was a good idea, I don’t know. All it’s left me with is an image of several white-coats laughing evilly, having just discovered the ultimate means to get the consumer to buy any crap they can dream up.
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My guess was a creamy lime sherbet flavored with a packet of taco seasoning mix — salty, very sweet, and a bit spicy. Like a dummy I bought the big bag on sale, ate 3 or 4, and chucked the rest in the trash. Nasty stuff and a waste of $2.50.
I think they taste like lime skittles threw up on them. Yuck.
Since I work in a grocery store, I had been seeing these for about a week. I figured it couldn’t be TOO bad, could it?
Open it up, smelled about like salt and vinegar chips, which disheartened me because I hate those. Try one… And at first it was as I expected.. sour and salty… but then it started to sink in….. I’m eating fruity pebble flavored chips… which is pretty bad.
I go to the site, learn that it is Mountain Dew…. and that’s the last I’ll be trying of these.
For anyone thinking “oh, these are probably good! It’s mountain dew!”. No. Salty.. Fruity.. Pebbles. That’s exactly what they taste like.. no more, no less. If that’s your cup of tea.. have at them.. Otherwise, avoid.
I just tried these. I was pretty convinced the correct answer was Froot Loops.
We tried these tonight. The doritos site was so memory intensive insane that it crashed my year old computer.
Anyway. Glad you outed the flavor, because yeah, Mountain Dew is it! We were killing ourselves trying to place it. For the record we find these things DISGUSTING. Waste of a bag.
i actually loved the other mystery flavor. I stocked up on the cheeseburger doritos and I hated it when they canceled them. These new ones taste terrible. I thought they tasted EXACTLY like fruit loops but with citrus.
http://pixblix.com
You tell em TwobitMe! the only Doritos I ever liked were the Jap and Cheese 3Ds. I know I know alot of people hated 3Ds but I cant help missing the Jap and Cheese ones.